Samsmom: Life, Joy, Loss and Loving your Mitochondria

Discharge day from the hospital is a party….

Whooo Hooo!!! We are outta here!!!

Emails are sent, family is called and bags are packed. Everything is planned in anticipation of being able to spend precious time at home.

Home….where you can pee without worrying who will walk in. Brush your teeth without being interrupted and spend time in a room bigger than 20′ x 15.

Home is good.

And I’m a big fan of a party.

So today, when we got the okay to go home and to plan the discharge party, it was so very disappointing to put the kibash on it all.

But somewhere in the last 24 hours, our smiley girl became a little peanut who was still in a lot of pain and when I woke her up and got her ready to go home, this became very obvious to me. She still has a lot of belly distress and perhaps we started her feeds too soon.

When Samantha started to show signs of distress, I insisted on a lipase test which indicates pancreatic health. Her lipase is now at 777, meaning we are moving in the wrong direction….up instead of down. Samantha was taken off her feeds and put back on I.V. fluids.

So tonight we postpone the discharge party.

It’s okay. I would rather postpone than host a party we aren’t ready for.

But it’s tough to be the party pooper….tell the doctors to slow things down….insist that she is not ready to go home when really all I want to do is go home, have a meal fixed in my kitchen, put my daughter to bed in her room and cuddle next to my husband.

Ugh, to be the responsible grown-up….so very overrated.