blog

Last Halloweek Post!

For those who have been following the small business Halloween posts from my writer’s group, here is the last one written by yours truly- a salon for witches.

Happy Halloween!

Hello My Pretty Day Spa:

In today’s small business feature, we are happy to announce the grand opening of “Hello My Pretty Day Spa,” a full service exclusive salon for witches and warlocks.

Waste no time, hop on that broom, Kick off those pointy shoes, relax with a steamy eye of newt brew and your very own feral black cat- assigned to you at time of check in.

Flying monkeys driving you crazy during quarantine? We understand. Hello My Pretty is an exclusive day spa. Leave the flying monkeys outside while you indulge in a spectacular lunch of spider eggs and toads.

Have you indulged in one too many small children during the time of COVID? Our cool sculpting technicians will get you right back into that black dress- ready for a night of terrorizing the villagers.

Has your evil eye lost its radiant evilness? Come in for our exclusive chemical peel of goats eye and frog hairs…..that evil eye will stop Doorthy in her tracks- leaving her no time at all to steal your ruby slippers.

Yes, during this time of COVID, it can feel like a house has landed on top of your sister but don’t you worry my evil coven- we are here for you.

To quote owner and respected wicken, Lori Appleby-Hoke. “It’s not easy being green. But at hello My Pretty Day Spa, we double, double, toil and trouble……over you.”

blog

Halloweek Day 3- To handout replacement knees!


Shake Your Bones at The Rib Cage
By Tracy Skochil for the Skeleton StarFeeling

Covid-catatonic and wanting to get out and move? A new fitness center down on Main Street may be just what skeletons (over the age of 18) have been waiting for! Owner Heather Schichtel, a long-time resident of Fossil Creek and active community organizer, decided to take the plunge and open during the pandemic.“I mean, the world is unpredictable. What are souls in this town going to do, wait forever for life to get back to normal?” Heather said, turning up the incline on her treadmill.

“Skeletons have got to get out and move. Staying in one place makes our joints stiffen, and no one wants that.”The Rib Cage Gym has everything from group fitness and kickboxing to spin classes and circuit training. The Little Socket Daycare is open from 6am to 8pm. The gym has luxurious showers, saunas to ease those creaky bones, a milk bar, and a calcium-enriched swimming pool. There’s a special introductory offer running for October: sign up the whole family and get free access to the movie theatre for six months. Jog or pedal along to everyone’s favorite, A Nightmare before Christmas, playing twice daily until December 26.

“We can all agree 2020 has been a year most skeletons would like to leave in the dust. So make plans now to join us on New Year’s Eve for our 8-hour cycle-thon to ride into 2021,” said Heather. “Replacement knees will be available to help you go the distance!”Call 1-888-Get-MOVIN for membership pricing.

blog

Happy Halloweek! Pt 2.

Devils Food Anyone?

A Bloody DelightLocal Restaurant Review:

Sweet Fang BakeryBy Leah Byrd of the Vampyre Times

The moment you walk into Sweet Fang Bakery, you’re greeted by the aroma of fresh blood and sweet pastry.  The owner and pastry chef, JoBeth Jamison, is a genius with red blends and has developed her own line of both natural and synthetic jams and syrups. “They’re secret clan recipes that have been passed down for millennia,” said Jamison with a sly grin.

With a carefully curated menu of both fresh and aged blood types, Sweet Fang Bakery offers a refined assortment of treats worth killing for. The towering croquembouche with caramelized B positive is the obvious showstopper, and few are able to resist the temptation of the red velvet cupcake with the surprise filling, but the cranberry scones with O negative clotted cream are what will keep you coming back again and again.

The Sweet Fang Bakery is a local hot-spot and a bloody delight (pun intended), and the perfect place to bring your out-of-town friends and family. Just be sure to get in line early or you might miss out on the half-priced lattes with steamed plasma. 

blog

Happy Halloween!

Bibbity bobbity boo!

I have not posted in OVER A MONTH because sometimes when your heart is heavy, it is hard to be insightful and poignant.

So forget ALL of that!

In the spirit of Halloween, my fellow talented writer friends have put together small business review for ghouls and goblins. If you are looking for writers prompts for your Littles these are a lot of fun and funny. Here is day one- Enjoy!

Taking Ogreship: By JoBeth Jamison

Need a fix? This week’s highlighted Ogre-owned business, The Pits, promises to deliver on every Ogre auto repair—gigantic or small, foot or fart powered.

Owner and operator Tracy Skochil, a Triple Onion-certified mechanic, started her career following in her mother’s and father’s stompsteps in MonsCar pit crews and fast became one of the sport’s most valuable assets.“I’ve always just been a sponge for the way things work,” says Skochil. “And for Grawp’s Pumpkin Eyeball Ale—I soak that up by the barrel every fall,” she chuckles.

Skochil ultimately transitioned into the role of world-renowned crew and engine consultant, which inadvertently led to her become THE mechanic to the stars. (Shrek and Fiona now refer to her as their “Motor Queen” since Skochil achieved what they were told was impossible: a full restoration of their iconic 1576 Zweibel Princess Coach after their notoriously wild child Bink drove it into the Royal Tar Pits last year.)

But Skochil’s own notoriety has never been her comfort zone. After a while she began to miss her Forest of Illusion roots. Despite the sparkle of her luxury-cargo-plane-set life, Skochil says, “I’m a swamp girl, through and through. I was never not going to come back here and be part of the community I love.”

She recently bought the dilapidated Humbaba estate in neighboring Cedar Forest and turned one of the out buildings into her retirement plan: The Pits, where she and her parents now work together full time. From Toyogres to Mercedes Bones, Chevrolegs to Caniballacs, Hyundeyes, to Infiniteeth, Bulkwagens, and more, The Pits promises superior service with that one-of-a-kind, superstar-swamp-ogress, Skochil Family flare—without the flashbulbs