Nitty Gritty Dirty Grief


I am living two lives.

One life gets on a plane, attends conference calls and develops marketing plans.

The other life is focused on our foundation, the world we once lived with Samantha and carrying on the important work she left me to do.

It’s a lot of balls in the air but I am grateful for them in their own way. Work keeps me busy, the foundation gives it all purpose. At least today.

Tuesday after work, I got everything ready for our Wednesday support group meeting. We were having a supply swap which meant going through Samantha’s medical equipment.

We have a lot of it…..


I pulled out her feeding buttons and thought,

Maybe I should save one just in case.

This made me smirk a little and think for what? It’s those tiny moments that solidify what world we are now in….a world without feeding buttons…and sometimes I feel sad about that.

I went upstairs with a box full of medical supplies and told my husband about my odd desire to keep a button ‘just in case’.

His response was, “Well, I would hope we won’t ever need it!”….which made me smile….hubby…keepin’ it real.

So buttons and syringes were packed in the back of the station wagon and given to another family who could use them….and then I answered a conference call.

2 thoughts on “Calling”

  1. You are good at many balls in the air, after all this is not unchartered territory for you. I have been thoroughly enjoying all the sharing of the mito foundation through my epilepsy 5k work 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s