Beauty and the Grief

I love pretty things.

I do.

As a little girl, I loved dressing up. I loved make-up. Playing with my Grandma Dodie’s lipstick. When I was three my Papa and Dodie bought me a new dress with pink ruffled undies. They took me out to dinner. I ordered a Shirley Temple and proceed to show off those amazing pink undies.

I tapped around that restaurant in my patent leather shoes like I owned the place.

I still love patent leather shoes. Because they are sooooo shiney.

I wore a tiara in my hair when I got married. I loved it so much I wore it the next day to brunch.

Because I could.

I love pretty. I have battled with pretty. I went prematurely gray at 22. I have varicose veins that look like someone shoved a hose in my leg and I have a speckled face from skin damage. Mohs surgery and a bad accident with Ultimate Frisbee didn’t help any of that. Life has not been kind.

But I still want to be pretty.

It is especially hard to be pretty when grieving. I didn’t dye my hair when pregnant with Jack. When we lost him, I marched into a Fantastic Sam’s and told them to cut my hair as short as they could to let the rest of the grey grow out. The poor hair stylist did this with trepidation and then apologized as I sat in her chair and sobbed. I looked as sad as I felt. I should probably write that poor woman a thank you note.

When Samantha was sick, my only concern was to make sure I didn’t stink.

Breath? Check

Pits? Check

All is good. Bring in the doctors. Pretty is an after thought.

This week I signed up to be a consultant for a skin care line called Rodan and Fields. I have been using their product for two years and I really like it.

It makes me feel…….pretty. My poor face doesn’t look so grievous and dehydrated.

I write this with my new favorite word; trepidation. Being almost 49, my time as Miss Universe has probably passed πŸ™‚ But all of us, no matter what we have gone through, deserve to feel our very best- grieving or not. Crisis or not, we can still be our very best.

And wear our tiara πŸ™‚

You can find me peddling my wares at:

Or shoot me a message- I will send you samples. And maybe a tiara πŸ™‚

I am now going to enjoy a Shirley Temple. Happy Thursday all.

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