Nitty Gritty Dirty Grief

2014 is Calling

It is a new year. 

I still hate push ups. 

It took me three weeks to feel normal after the flu. 

Christmas has come and gone and I now have only 11 ½ months to make this year extraordinary.

So far it is off to a good start. Did you know our work was mentioned in Denver’s Magazine 5280? You can find it here:
The North American Mitochondrial Disease Consortium? 

Only possible with money from Summits for Samantha. And the article came out on December 31st…..and I thought well, this is a good way to start the year.

So it begins. 

If you live in Colorado you know that marijuana is now legal. This happened on January 1, 2014. And if you don’t live in Colorado, I can tell you, for us Average Joe’s nothing has really changed. The mountain air stills smells of pine, not pot. And I have yet to use the phase Are you completely stoned??!!! With a co-worker, buddy or hubs….although now that I mention it, I might have to….just cuz.

I have finally watched Downton Abbey and realized it is not Downtown Abbey. Ah….the things I learn in 2014.

I have jumped on the Denver Broncos Bandwagon. I am not a huge football fan but I have decided that Peyton Manning is quite impressive. And for NOT being a huge football fan, I like watching him play. I’ve even started running around the office yelling hurry hurry’!  Sadly, it hasn’t had the same effect…..chalk it up to another lesson of 2014.

I traveled last week to DC. I haven’t been on the road in months and love to going to DC. No matter what is going on in the government, visiting DC still makes me feel hopeful. I had an extra two hours before my plane and found myself…..

At the Holocaust Museum.

I have been wanting to go for a while….well wanting is not the right word. I have been intrigued about how one memorializes something so horrific….how such a tragedy can be explained, contained in a building, captured into four walls. And as my own search for resiliency continues, I am intrigued by those who have found it in the past.

I stood in line. A volunteer asked where I was from.

“Colorado,” I said.

“Well, that’s a long way away.”

“Yes,” I paused and cleared my throat. “I’m kind of scared to go in. I don’t know what to expect.”

“Well, it’s not an easy thing to talk about is it?”

“No, but it’s important.” 

And so I put on my 2014 big girl pants and went through the exhibit.

I have tried to put into words what I thought about the museum and I find it hard without sounding trite. Two images stay in my head…..the tiny train car used to transport people to the camps and the tiny Danish boat used to help people escape to Sweden…..a transport of despair and a transport of hope.

As I made my way to the end, there were stories of survivors, stories of resiliency, amazing, sad, hopeful, terrifying stories. And I thought, how did these survivors go on? How did they live a life after all of the death?

All I could draw on was our own experience, which pales in comparison but it was all I had. And I thought of the beauty we find in simple things; a sunrise, a sunset…..and the importance of having a voice and carrying on the story. The beauty, tragedy and irony of life continuing on.

And so hello 2014. 365 days….what will be taught, what lessons do you have to give? The first 12 have been…life….thoughtful, trivial, draining, enriching….life

I still do hate push-ups. 

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