The Samantha Years

I’m an alien

When Samantha first became sick, a friend of mine gave me a copy of Welcome to Holland. I thought it was fabulous, poignant and I felt like I had landed in Holland. I have become used to Holland, comfortable perhaps with what might seem out of the ordinary to a tourist. What others might gawk at, I have learned to embrace because it is our life. I even love my wooden shoes.

After this week however, I have learned that there is a place more foreign than Holland. Sometimes just being in another country does not do the craziness justice. It it not just getting used to another language, it is another solar system, another galaxy. Touring a canal does not address the drama, the slime, the anxiety, it does not address the question that keeps popping up in my mind…...what messed up planet have we landed on?

Lately I’ve started to feel a bit like Greg….the Alien….

Notice the tail….

I have given this look several times in the last week….

I now communicate in clicks and squeals.

The question is….am I the invader or the invadee? I can’t decide.

The good news is Samantha is getting better. The influenza that has settled in her lungs is starting to break up. As a result, she is pretty congested and we are suctioning her quite a lot….nothing we don’t think we can’t handle at home. She also started her feeds yesterday. If she can tolerate the formula, we’ll be able to go home.

Hopefully tomorrow we will be beamed off this crazy planet.

Which is good….my alien tail needs to be trimmed.

Beam us up Scotty.

The Samantha Years

All the thoughts of a turtle are turtle….Emerson

A day is 24 hours…..

1440 minutes…..

86,400 seconds…..

A lot can happen in 86,400 seconds. Oxygen levels can regulate on their own, heart rates can become consistent, lipase levels can decrease, temps can drop to normal…..even a mama can find her ‘kool‘ again.

That’s right we’re kool….and hangin‘ on the 8th floor.

Chillin like a villain.

In 86,400 seconds Samantha can go from being in the PICU to hearing tiny utterances of a discharge plan.

The discharge plan is slow….

Days slow….but it is out there.

Slow and steady wins the race…..

You can call me Turtle.

The Samantha Years

PICU Sucks

I wanted to say I hate the PICU….

But I don’t really. I just hate the fact we’re here. The PICU stands for the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit…..reserved for really sick kids.

The doors are all sliding glass so the nurse can observe kids 24 hours a day. We are at one end of the PICU, the bathroom is at the other end….so, if you have to pee, you have to walk past 12 rooms of sick kids.

12 rooms….

I try to ‘hold it’ so I don’t even have to walk past 12 rooms. If I do, I try not to look in…..ugh…. kiddos hooked up to five different machines, parents with that ‘lost’ look in their eyes….

if you gotta be here, you gotta be here but yeah, the PICU sucks.

We are here tonight because Samantha crashed while being sedated for her MRI. When the anesthesiologist started her ‘cocktail’ of meds, her heartbeat became irregular and her oxygen stats dropped to 60% .

The doctor immediately stopped the sedation process. Samantha woke up on the way back to the recovery room with a doozy of a seizure.

Big seizure + irregular heartbeat + dropped stats = PICU

She looks better tonight and is resting comfortably. We have no results from the MRI because it just didn’t happen.

Her belly remains a mystery.

I’m okay with that.

Hoping to be back on 8 tomorrow.

Send Samantha a cheer card here 🙂

The Samantha Years

All’s Quiet on the Western Front…..

Therefore I am heading off to my hospital cot.

Samantha is hanging in there. She is one tough little pickle. She has a lower respiratory infection which explains her low grade temps and possibly her seizures. The infection has also created excess fluid in her heart and lungs so we are also being followed by cardiology.

Abdominal MRI tomorrow to look for reasons for her pancreatitis.

She looked gray and sick today but pinked up this evening. She is currently sleeping….

Mama is hoping to be sleeping soon.

Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers. If you would like send Samantha a cheer card, you can do it here.