Life Today

At a Loss

You should sit down. 

Are you sitting? 

This weekend I found myself at a loss for words. 


In fact I feel that the English language has completely failed me. This is ironic because I am an English major and I have recently become completely obsessed with Words with Friends. And I LOVE to talk.

But sometimes there are no words. 

There are no words when you look out at a group of people who have ridden 120+ miles for your cause. 

There are no words for a group that has given thousands of dollars for an obscure disease with no cure.

Thank you doesn’t seem to cut it. 

Gratitude seems trite. 


This weekend was life. In its beauty. In its sadness. In its loss. In its hope and in its love. It was all wrapped up over two days, 3 mountain passes and 6,000 feet in elevation. 

“It was the hardest thing I have ever done.” said one rider. 

Maria likened this ride to what Jacob went through every day. 

I just thought it was hard. And amazing. And what is the word for that? Hamazing? 

Yes, it was Hamazing. 

As us riders rode, our incredible group at the house prepped a total of 150lbs of smoked yumminess from Texas, a vat of potato salad and endless pans of macaroni and cheese. 


On Saturday evening I stood in front of this group. My heart felt so full it could float out of my chest. And there was nothing I could say that would do this feeling justice. 

So I cried. 

Six years ago yesterday we lost our Miss to this awful disease.

I had no words then. 

Yesterday I drove down from Copper; tired, joyful sad, and so overwhelmingly grateful. 

And I have no words now. 

Perhaps my emotions cannot be contained by Webster’s. It cannot be defined or explained. 

But I am in awe of all of you and what you have done this weekend. 

Thank you.


Life Today

I love you the way I learned to ride a bike

This year I went a little crazy and ordered Summits for Samantha t-shirts. 

I have to say, I heart them. 

We have sage green and pink for the Ladies

And gray and green for the Gents. 

But my favorite is the back. I love this quote by Rudy Francisco. 

The Men’s shirts showed up today and I held one up for Hubs. 

“What do you think?” I asked

“I don’t get the quote.” 

“You don’t get it?” 

“I don’t get it.” 

“Don’t you remember learning how to ride a bike and you were so scared and the bike wobbled and you were all like whoa………do I have this? I don’t think I have this. And you were so afraid that you would fall and you did fall and it hurt but you got back up?” 

“I don’t remember this,” he said. 

“Well you should!” 

And then I went on my tangent… 

“My first bike was a Schwinn and she was rainbow colored and she had a yellow banana seat and I named her Rainbow, which wasn’t very original but I was six. And I LOVED her! And Rainbow and I would ride in the middle of the road and do figure eights and I would pretend she was a pony. One day I got honked at- which was rude.”

I paused.

“I wonder where Rainbow is now.” 

Hubs continued to look at me.

So I went on…….

“But being in love is kind of like this. You could fall, you could get horrifically banged up, you WILL fall but you have to be reckless- you have to trust the bike.” 

And I went on.

“AND loving someone whole-heartedly? Someone who is sick? Someone who you know will leave this life before you? How reckless and scary is that? But you do it anyway, because you can’t help yourself. Because it is love. And that’s what this ride is about- for all of these families; for us, it is reckless, and scary and love.” 

“Don’t you love these shirts?” 

He looked at me and paused, “I love these shirts.” 

I tossed Hubs a large. 


And Scary

And love.